I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
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