Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
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