so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
