And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
The Internet Is Obsessed With This Stripper Who Dropped It Low Just To Eat A Slice Of Pizza
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
39 Memes Anyone Who Cries When They See Their Bank Account Will Relate To
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
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