had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
Randomize
