I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
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