My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize