This is not my ceiling
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
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At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
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And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
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