She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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