Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Randomize
