you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
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