i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
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