she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
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