addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
My pussy is not your playground.
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
