So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Randomize
