What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
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