Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord

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(570): i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord http://tfl.nu/ym53

Replies (10) Good night (2982) Bad night (831)
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(720): View more from Colorado

He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".

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(720): He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost". http://tfl.nu/8ltm

Replies (39) Good night (8223) Bad night (820)
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(508): View more from Massachusetts

i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook

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(508): i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook http://tfl.nu/ft2u

Replies (36) Good night (10451) Bad night (1019)
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(248): View more from Michigan

I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.

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(248): I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name. http://tfl.nu/axbm

Replies (33) Good night (1757) Bad night (13955)
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(608): View more from Wisconsin

Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.

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(608): Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard. http://tfl.nu/diwn

Replies (15) Good night (4718) Bad night (1237)
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(912): View more from Georgia

just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end

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(912): just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end http://tfl.nu/x0of

Replies (12) Good night (3375) Bad night (1246)
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(503): View more from Oregon

That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.

(1-503): View more from Oregon

THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO

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(503): That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal. (1-503): THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO http://tfl.nu/95vh

Replies (10) Good night (2826) Bad night (731)
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(262): View more from Wisconsin

You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose

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(262): You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose http://tfl.nu/d8zc

Replies (7) Good night (1656) Bad night (961)
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(818): View more from California

All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.

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(818): All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since. http://tfl.nu/jafz

Replies (7) Good night (1111) Bad night (1163)
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(207): View more from Maine

I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.

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(207): I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager. http://tfl.nu/qawn

Replies (3) Good night (1049) Bad night (515)
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(252): View more from North Carolina

Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.

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(252): Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation. http://tfl.nu/waj0

Replies (5) Good night (939) Bad night (702)
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(805): View more from California

I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka

(714): View more from California

I could

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(805): I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka (714): I could http://tfl.nu/hbcr

Replies (7) Good night (1115) Bad night (509)
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(901): View more from Tennessee

I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around

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(901): I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around http://tfl.nu/mpwe

Replies (0) Good night (809) Bad night (336)
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(980): View more from North Carolina

I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.

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(980): I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle. http://tfl.nu/hjcy

Replies (7) Good night (664) Bad night (314)
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(309): View more from Illinois

Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.

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(309): Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight. http://tfl.nu/zbhe

Replies (1) Good night (553) Bad night (258)

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