I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
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