so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
Randomize