just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
What changed your mind?
Being sober
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Randomize
