Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
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