i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
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