You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
