Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Randomize
