Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
