your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
