Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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