My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Randomize
