Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
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