"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
