toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
I wish I could teleport
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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