last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
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