my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
Randomize
