so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
Randomize