Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
you will always have a special place in my vag
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
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