So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Randomize