Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
I could make wine with my vomit
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I JUST MACED MY OWN FACE
This is by far the best text I have ever woken up to.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
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