I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
