Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
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