It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
Randomize
