I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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