Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
Randomize
