You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
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