absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Randomize