Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
