there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
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