Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
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