Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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