We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair
Found more tequila
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
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