Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
