you sent me 5 happy birthday texts last night. one after the other. spelled differently.
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
don't judge my taste in strippers
Randomize